Chapter 1:

I slammed my fist into the bag over and over, every movement relieving just a little of the anger I felt building inside me. Sweat poured down my body in rivulets as I pushed myself harder and faster. No matter how much I tried, I couldn’t get the demons in my head to shut the fuck up. I needed a release, some time away from everyone around here.

I thought leaving the last time would do the trick, but every time I left, it made it that much harder to return. My mind refused to settle, and not even the threat of war could get me out of this fucked up state I was in. I’d taken a life, bled the man dry, but it didn’t even scratch the surface of what I was feeling.

I punched the bag again just as an image of Zoe’s mother flashed through my mind. She was lying in bed, barely alive. The woman I knew faded so fast. I got to spend hardly any time with her. But that was just my luck in life. People came and went like a bad rash.

The emergency ringtone sounded on my phone, signaling we had an important meeting. I ignored it, but it would just keep going off until I answered the damn thing. Stepping away from the bag, I snatched a towel off the bench nearby and swiped it over my face. After draping it around my neck, I picked up my phone and swiped open the screen. 

Emergency meeting in the conference room.

The last thing I wanted was to be around other people, but when I signed up for this job, I knew sometimes I’d have to bite the bullet and do shit I didn’t like. I grabbed my bag and headed for the elevator. Just the thought of being around other people right now made my skin crawl, and as I stepped onto the elevator, I felt the tiny bit of contentment slipping away.

When I stepped out, people were rushing around and shouting at one another. Chaos had taken over, and the normal calm demeanor of my boss was gone. Cash was shouting at everyone as he rushed to the conference room. I hadn’t ever seen him or anyone else this worked up before. Was the building on fire? Were we under attack? 

I tossed my bag in the corner and quickly took a seat, switching to work mode. Whatever my own issues, this was obviously a priority one situation. Cash strode to the head of the table and pressed a button, filling the screen on the wall with a dossier. I leaned forward, resting my elbows on the table as I read over the file. 

“Everyone, quiet down!” Silence filled the room as we all stared at our boss, who at the moment didn’t look too happy. “This is Garrick Knight. He’s an assassin, and is currently in the hospital undergoing emergency surgery.”

“We’re taking a hit?” Lock asked, his eyebrows furrowed.

“No,” Cash said, exhaling deeply. “Our job is not to take him out, but to keep him safe.”

“Come again?” Thumper laughed.

“We’re protecting an assassin?” Scottie Dog asked.

Cash looked around the table at all of us. It was clear to me that no one was too interested in this job. For all the excitement of just a few moments ago, now a dark cloud hung over the room. “Look, I know this isn’t our typical client, but this was sent over from Reed Security.”

“Whoa,” Eli shook his head. “Reed Security…the same company that stole Sinner away from us?”

“They didn’t steal Sinner. He chose to leave us to be with the woman he loved.”

“Then let them take this job,” Red spoke up. “Why did they send him to us?”

“Reed Security has worked with Knight in the past on a job. Funnily enough, he was sent to kill Sebastian’s wife before changing his mind and helping them out of a rather tight spot.”

Everyone around the room just stared at Cash. I wasn’t sure what to make of that. An assassin was sent to kill the man’s wife, and then they employed him? Something wasn’t adding up.

“Whatever happened with Reed Security and Knight isn’t our concern. However, last night, Knight was protecting Kate Whittemore, the doctor that Reed Security has on standby. They were at a safe house when they were attacked, and Knight took a knife to the chest. They were able to get him out and stabilize him for the time being, but as of right now, everyone at Reed Security—aside from Sebastian—thinks Knight is dead. And it needs to stay that way.”

“Tell us why,” Rae demanded from Cash. “Why would we protect an assassin and put ourselves at risk like that?”

“I gotta agree with Rae on this one, boss,” Edu said with a shake of his head. “Assassins make a lot of enemies. I don’t particularly want to be one of them.”

Cash chose his words carefully as he continued. “Knight has decided to go straight, to make a life for himself at Reed Security…with Kate, the doctor. Apparently, there’s something Sebastian sees in Knight, and he wants to give him the chance to turn his life around.”

“Then let him do it on his own,” Slider answered. “Sorry, but I’m not putting my ass on the line for a guy that could just as easily turn on me.”

“Ooh, I’ll do it,” I raised my hand. I could use the distraction, and frankly, the idea of getting inside this guy’s head was tempting.

Cash ignored me and continued. “Right now, he’s injured and needs rest and a doctor’s supervision. He’s still considered in critical condition. I need a team that can go to him since he can’t be moved.”

“I’m all over that, boss,” I said enthusiastically. “Who’s with me?”

No one responded and Cash looked pleadingly at all of them. “Really, anyone that’s willing will get overtime.”

“Boss, we all know what we signed up for when we took this job,” IRIS said, “but this is just insanity.”

“You blow shit up for a living,” Lock snorted.

“Yeah, but on my terms. This guy is an assassin. I don’t need to wake up with a knife in my back, or worse, have him bring heat down on us from past jobs.”

I stood this time, thinking someone would join me. “Again, I’m all over this.”

“He’s psychotic,” Cash sighed.

“I’m psychotic.”

“He doesn’t play well with others.”

I slapped my hands against my chest and grinned. “Neither do I!”

“It’s a long job. Keeping him alive is only phase one of the job.”

“Phase me in,” I smirked.

Cash looked around. “I really need a three man team on this. Three people that can work well together,” he emphasized.

“Boss,” I chuckled, glancing around the room at the others. “I’m sort of getting the feeling you don’t want me on this job.”

“What about you, Jack? This is the sort of job your team takes.”

I stood there a little pissed that he was talking around me as if I wasn’t here, like I wasn’t volunteering to take a job that everyone else clearly wasn’t on board with.

“Ya know, we do black ops,” Jack answered. “This is babysitting.”

I rushed around the table, getting right in Cash’s face. I’d make him send me if it was the last thing I did. “Boss, you know I’m the man for the job. I’m great under pressure and with annoying assholes.”

“Yes, but we’re trying to keep this one alive. If you kill him, that sort of defeats the purpose of the job.”

“Hey, I’m a very likable guy,” I said defensively.

“Yes,” he nodded slowly. “To people that know you.”

“So, send me with…” I glanced around the room, trying to figure out who would best work with me. “Rae and IRIS.”

“No,” Rae stood up. “I’m not going on a long mission with Fox. Not gonna happen.”

“IRIS, you can set explosives all around the house,” I said excitedly. “It’ll be just like old times.”

“Yeah, as fun as it sounds to blow someone up, I’d rather shoot myself than go on a long assignment with an assassin.”

“Seriously?” I asked the whole room incredulously. “Am I the only one that sees the benefit of this? To get inside the mind of a killer and pick his brain apart?”

“We sort of already have that with you,” Slider answered. “I think that’s enough to last a lifetime.”

“New Guy,” I turned where he was leaning against the wall. “You’re crazy like me. This is the perfect job for you.”

“Sending two psychopaths on the road with an assassin,” Lock snorted. “What could possibly go wrong?”

I scoffed as I looked around the room. I couldn’t believe no one else was excited about this assignment. This was like…the holy grail of assignments. “Fine, I’ll do it myself. He’s injured. It’s not like I need backup.”

“No, we’ll work something else out,” Cash said as he stood. 

“Boss—”

“Fox, sending you in would be like asking for World War III to break out and devastate the entire planet. Sorry, but he would kill you if he had to spend more than two minutes in the same room as you.”

“Are you suggesting that I can’t take care of myself?”

“No,” he sighed. “I know you can, but putting the two of you in the same room together is suicide, for you and everyone else involved.” He slapped me on the shoulder as he walked toward the door. “We need to move on this immediately. Sebastian will have him moved to a safe house tomorrow, and I’ll make a decision by then who’s going on the job.”

The door closed behind him and I turned back to the rest of the guys, sighing as I sat down in a huff. “Well, that sucks. It would have been a great job.”

“Fox, face it,” Jack eyed me. “You would have gone in singing show tunes, and he would have put a bullet between your eyes.”

“Agreed, I’m not sure that you’re the best choice either,” Rae said. “Two psychos in the same house isn’t very productive.”

“Or it’s extremely productive. For all you know, we’d get along great. Maybe I’d give him some pointers and—”

“He’d snap your neck at the first suggestion.” Slider pushed back his chair and stood. “Face it, there are some jobs you’re meant for, but this isn’t one of them.”

He clapped me on the shoulder as he walked past me. Everyone else nodded in agreement as they walked out, leaving me all alone with Rae. She was kicked back in a chair with her feet up on the table, watching me carefully.

“What are you still doing here?” I asked, feeling like shit after being cast aside.

“Just wondering what’s going through your head.”

I snorted at that. She didn’t want to know the shit going on in my head. I was pissed as hell this morning when I came in, and then I had the opportunity of a lifetime, only for it to be snatched out of my hands. I was so fucking tired of the darkness creeping into my head and taking over. I knew I needed to get away, but I thought taking this job would help. To know that there was someone out there as fucked up as me gave me hope, especially when I heard he wanted to turn his life around.

Sometimes I thought that I was on the verge of making a change in my life, but deep down I knew that I would always be this version of myself. From the moment I made the decision to take a life, I knew this wasn’t something I would ever get over. I could usually keep a tight leash on my anger, and it didn’t hurt that Cash tossed baddies at me from time to time, allowing me to work out that anger that seeped into my mind like a black hole. 

What I needed was something no one at this company could provide me with. She was my light, my reason to keep going. From the moment I laid eyes on her, I knew she was my salvation, as stupid as that sounded. It was strange the way her life ran parallel to my mom’s. I had made it my life’s work to keep an eye on her and make sure she never took the same path. I wouldn’t allow it. She was too sweet to ever have her life end in such a horrible way. I was her protector, even if she didn’t know it.

I shoved back from my chair, determined to get out of my head and finally see the woman I tried to keep my distance from. I stormed for the door, but Rae called out to me.

“Fox, where are you going?”

I looked over my shoulder at her. I would never tell anyone where I went. “To set my head straight.”

“You’re not…” She sat up and walked over to me, the look of concern on her face almost convinced me she cared. “Fox, I know things haven’t been right since Zoe’s mom passed. Are you doing okay?”

I was far from okay. “Just peachy. Can’t you tell?”

“No,” she said bluntly. 

“I will be.”

She gave a tight nod, and then did something insane. She wrapped her arms around me and gave me a hug. “Don’t get yourself killed.”

“Don’t worry about me.”

She stepped back and then slugged me hard across the jaw, leaving a small trail of blood where she broke the skin. “Don’t make me come kick your ass,” she said as she stormed out.

I grinned and wiped the blood from my face. I loved that woman.